Growing up my mom always had a really close group of friends. In all reality, they weren’t just her friends, or even best friends; they were our family. They were the women and men we referred to as our “aunts and uncles”. To this day those people are still around and are still considered our aunts and uncles without hesitation. By the time I was a teenager my parents were divorced and that left my mom a single, full-time working mother to four kids. These people stepped in and helped in ANY way they could to make sure my mom made it through the day sanely. They were a tribe of sorts, a parenting tribe. So if you couldn’t tell by now I grew up with the “it takes a village” mentality.
Now I’m an adult (questionable on many days) and 8 months pregnant with my first child. When I first found out I was pregnant, for a few minutes I felt really terrified, which is funny considering we planned this pregnancy. Little by little we started to tell our family and friends. From there came all the doctors appointments and all the ‘can’s and cannot’s’ for my pregnancy. I’m an extremely independent person and don’t like to be told when I can’t do something, especially if it was something I was previously doing. Let me clarify, I’m not talking about what I could and couldn’t eat or what kinds of medicines I could and couldn’t have to keep my baby safe. I’m talking about simple day to day activities like lifting certain things, not being able to use certain cleaning products, not being able to change the cat litter, etc. As my pregnancy progressed the list got longer and longer. The doctor said I had to have help and not try to be superwoman.
It’s been a tough 8 months trying to abide by the rules and yes, they have been broken from time to time. But through it all the most amazing thing happened. Or maybe it didn’t happen at all and it’s been there all along. I just never noticed it because I was too busy trying to be independent. My tribe appeared. My very own tribe!
I like to call it my pregnancy tribe.
They have been there to support me emotionally. They were there to help us when my husband and I moved into a house this summer and I couldn’t do anything but watch. They were there to cry with me, to lift me up when I felt sad and most importantly they were and are there every single day, without fail, because they want to be.
As the baby comes and life changes, my pregnancy tribe will turn into my parenting tribe and I welcome it with open arms. These are the people who will continue to help us, support us, love us and most importantly provide all these things and more to Baby Grimes.
Do you have a tribe? Who’s in yours and what do they mean to you?