Potty Training and the Single Mom
Potty Training and the Single Mom

Some parenting tasks, like potty training are really challenging, and they can be even more stressful for the single mom. My niece Jessi is raising her little girl Jaylynn alone with the assistance of her parents and paid childcare workers. This blog post is a transcript of my virtual interview with this young mom.

jaylynn
This is Jaylynn…the purrrfect candidate for potty training!

A:    What techniques are you using to potty train your toddler? (pull-ups, regular potty “tries”, day care workers, no diapers or pull ups when indoors, etc. )?

J:     We started when my daughter showed interest in potty–first with frequent potty visits, then when she started recognizing the urge to go, or realizing that she had already went, we went out and bought her some princess underwear to wear over her diaper. That was a hassle for day care, though, so we went the pull up route.

A:    When your toddler potties on the potty, what do you give them as a reward or encouragement?

J:     We just clap and cheer and show excitement. I do not believe in rewarding or bribing with food—that’s disgusting! She has a sticker chart at the sitter’s house.

A:    How long have you been trying to potty train your toddler?

J:     She was fully potty trained for going #1 by 18 months–then she started daycare and they didn’t work on potty training in that room, so she lost it. After another year we are still working on getting it back.

A:    How long do you anticipate it will take to fully potty train your toddler?

J:     Not too much longer–definitely by 3 years–she knows when she goes, and she tells me after she goes, but she doesn’t tell me when she needs to go before it happens.

A:    What do you use on the child’s bed to protect it from overnight accidents? How has this worked for you?

J:     I do not use anything for her bed at the moment, she still wears a pull up to sleep

A:    Do you restrict food and/or drink before bedtime? For how many hours before, if so?

J:       We do not eat after 8 pm just for health and metabolism reasons, and she brings a cup of water to bed. I do not believe in restricting fluids. She is very thirsty in the morning.

A:    Do others help you with the potty training of your toddler? Who helps, if so? Do they use the same techniques that you use? (If not, has this caused any conflict or difficulties for your toddler?)

J:     The in-home sitter has more potty training luck than I do. She also has a three-year-old daughter, so seeing her daughter go potty helps my daughter want to go. They both have sticker charts when they successfully use the potty. They are allowed to be independent and try to use the potty whenever they like, or if they like. They use stools and potty seats that fit over the regular toilet seat for ease of use.

A: How many potties do you have in your house for practice?

J:     Two potty seats for the big toilets, and one stand-alone potty trainer. She just uses that as a stool for the big potty now.

A:    When did your child begin to tell you that she had a wet or dirty diaper? Was that a trigger to start potty training for you? If not, what was the indication your toddler gave you that it was time for potty training?

J:     She began telling me she had a wet diaper around 15 months; she knew she had pee in it. So at that time, I bought her a potty seat and just sat her on it one day and she went, and then she just kept on doing it again and again until it was routine. She wanted to so she did. Then, after she lost the routine at day care, that regular use stopped. She tells me every once in a while now that she has to go, but mostly after she has already gone in the pull up and tells me I have to change her…I think the novelty has worn off a bit.

So, as you can see, every potty-training mom and kid have setbacks and successes. But as another mom of a toddler and I were discussing yesterday, they all eventually make it—every kid learns how to go on his or her own. There’s no one way that’s foolproof, and if anyone on the planet tells you their kid was perfect from the get-go, they are lying! Just keep encouraging, providing opportunities, praising when something goes well, and eventually, you will have a little potty-pro on your hands. Then the REAL fun starts—having to stop every ten minutes because the little one with no more diapers has to go. Right now.

 

 

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